The gap between where we are in our equestrian journey and where we want to be can appear tremendous. Most riders have busy lives, and finding enough time to get to the barn every day can be difficult. It's sad to see riders express a negative thought pattern; the narrative in their head goes, “There’s not enough time to ride, I’m too old, I’m not fit enough,” and the list goes on. It's easy to adopt a negative feedback loop that sounds like this, we've all been there.
When low energy vibration starts affecting the way I ride and the relationship with my horses, it becomes a relevant topic. Many of the struggles I see when helping people with their horses are not horsemanship struggles at all; they are human struggles that surface when the horse is involved. When we’re not getting the results we'd like, it is often the human that needs to change.
There are also riders that send their horse to the trainer and say, "I'd fix it myself, I just don't have the time." This is code for, "I'm uncomfortable with the situation and don't know how to change it." Those that lead with such a statement usually have more undiscovered resistance in themselves than the horse they are sending for training.
There’s an old eastern proverb that goes, "When you think you know, you don't know. When you know that you don't know, you know."
It takes more than our own perspective to ensure that we are being honest. If we only have ourselves to answer to, it is difficult to develop the awareness to hold ourselves accountable. I have been fortunate to have two mentors that are both masters in different aspects of the industry, and they have held me accountable over the course of my career. I have learned to frequently check in to see if I am being clear about what I am teaching my horses. I have learned the hard way that if I get too off track, it is harder to clean up the mess after the fact, and besides that, I will have my mentors to answer to. That has sharpened my level of awareness and honesty. When I start to stray, I am quicker to say that I don’t know and I need help rather than skirting the issue.
“When you put in the work of expanding beyond your old protective story, you start to experience the game of life in a totally different way. You begin to move exponentially. You go from trying to control the external world through manipulation and force into first becoming aware of your reactions to the external world, expanding into a space of true acceptance and surrender, and finally allowing inspired creativity to fill the space that you’ve made in that moment. This is how you truly move into flow. This is how you create massive abundance. This is how you change your world.” -Kyle Cease
By embracing uncertainty and risk instead of avoiding it, we begin to tap into a higher vibration. Often times we can’t see very far through the fog, but we can see well enough to take the next step. The best goals are those that are small and sure, things we know we can handle in the next hour or day or week. Some goals may reveal themselves to us only after we start down the higher path; until one day we find ourselves exclaiming with joy, “I never thought I’d be doing this!” Our willingness to get uncomfortable and do the work turns into accomplishing goals that ignite our souls and bring genuine excitement into our lives.
If having fun is the priority, you’ll most likely miss out on your full potential. Having fun along the way becomes a byproduct of putting in the work and getting positive results. There will be fun times, but there will also be uncomfortable times of struggle. These moments are necessary for growth. Change does not come easy, and most people have no interest in changing. Learning something that isn’t second nature will go a lot better if we’re willing to be uncomfortable in order to promote growth. At times, it’s the exact opposite of fun. And that isn’t a trendy idea in today’s world, but someone has to say it. If the shoe fits, put it on.
To "mind the gap" is to think honestly about what it will take to get from where we are to where we want to be. We can start by asking, “What does life require of me to get there?” When we begin to develop greater awareness and responsibility, our perspective starts to change. Our horses (and our world) will open up. We will have a better connection with our horses, and people will come into our lives in alignment with our new values. We may have to let go of people and things that no longer serve us. It is a beautiful process. Since we have horses in our lives, we owe it to them to be the best leaders we can be. May we always be brave and curious enough to see what happens when self improvement becomes priority - May we always mind the gap.
Rachel’s favorite books on self improvement (because we can’t improve our horses without improving ourselves):
The Unteathered Soul, by Michael Singer
Living on Purpose, by Dan Millman
Mastery, by George Leonard
Daring Greatly, by Brene Brown
Power vs. Force, by David R. Hawkins
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